The case of a "BIRD"

LAST COURT SESSION, Ms MAE L's lawyer, Ms JoN, presented a valuable and enlightening information about hidden lives of a chicken.See below for a refresh.(impressive info below) "Adapted from this site http://www.goveg.com/f-hiddenliveschickens.asp Leading animal behavior scientists from across the globe now tell us that chickens are inquisitive and interesting animals whose cognitive abilities are more advanced than those of cats, dogs, and even some primates. Chickens understand sophisticated intellectual concepts, learn from watching each other, demonstrate self-control, worry about the future, and even have cultural knowledge that is passed from generation to generation. Chickens comprehend cause-and-effect relationships and understand that objects still exist even after they are hidden from view.2 This puts the cognitive abilities of chickens above those of small human children.3"
This session, Ms Mae L's PROSECUTOR , PERSECUTER and EXECUTER, Ms AbiL would like to rebutt with these points.(here is the purely entertaining bit)
1) from what i understand, the website is set up in hope to promote ethical treatment towards animals. I would like to remind everyone that the issue here is not about making lifestyle/personal choices- whether to go vegetarian. Or in MACRO terms, to prevent cruelty to animals.But rather, we are just talking about this unique breed of "bird", the MAE.
2) While i would like to acknowledge the intelligence of Chickens, afterall, Chickens give us protein and according to anthropologists (or scientists), protein was one of the causes of evolution for primates.To much of my dismay, MAE does not belong to the Chicken family. It is obvious as she doesnt lay eggs overtly.
3) Just as all of you are about to dismiss her as a mammal (becos she doesnt lay eggs), i would like to infer from the quote above provided by Mae's lawyer, that the cognitive abilities of all beings on earth are similar and they only vary in degrees.
4) So, we cannot conclude that Mae is a bird. nor is she of any kind of species.
5) Recently, planet Pluto, with the advancement of science and Man's never dying curiosity,has been booted out of our solar system. Fortunately, for it, we have a "humane" side so much that we decided to call it a mini planet and gave it 2 or 3 other brothers ( a new family).
6) I, AbiL, hereby appeal to the court with two fair and conservative options. First, like planet pluto, to keep her on earth becos our advancement in science has yet been able to classify her.We will boot her soon.this is the best option so that we wont offend both animal lovers and humanity of the human race.We cant afford another war. Second, she has enjoyed so much attention due to her pouting and....( i shall not name them). We can execute her in the Netherlands(not NEVERLAND) where euthanasia is legalised.
7) To much of our dismay, we cant classify the MAE anywhere. SO, it is advised that she should be DISMAED. Thank you.

FAST FACTS about the MAE specie
- While there is an eye opener, she/it invented the eye-roller
-"Boings" around
-The out of Sinc creature (often offers pointless sugg)
-self claimed identity: raindeer, bird,cat, lady, but most of the time, bird.

OT students, Section A.
1) List the problems MAE will be facing in terms of performance components. You are to assume that MAE is functioning as a human being.
2) Come up with a treatment plan by stating what you will be doing in 5 sessions.
3) List three goals for Mae.
4) Describe the gross anatomy of the eye.Name the muscles involved in rolling the eyes upwards.
5) Perform a PROM on her wings.
The session was adjourned at 5.42pm, 30 Aug 2006.
Note: this post is purely for class entertainment.